So did you guys hear about this? The new movie The Runaways based on the beginnings of such famous female rock icons as Joan Jett, Lita Ford, and Cherie Currie? Crazy! I find it terrifying that Kristen Stewart and Dakota freaking Fanning are portraying such awesomely strong women, but hey, I’ll give it a chance.

According to the reviews on this one, I hear it’s actually pretty good, sans Stewart’s humdrum acting. Apparently Fanning isn’t all THAT terrible. The movie drops in The States TODAY!, so if you’re into awesome, hardcore chick rock, totally check it out.

In the meantime, I have some totally awesome free schwag for you guys! How ’bout that!? What do you have to do? Hm.

What should I make you do?

I could make you do anything, if you loved Joan Jett enough (or on a lesser note, Kristen Stewart. Ugh). I could make you clean my house. Or make me a taxidermied monkey-rat-platypus. I could make you stand still while I tried to shoot apples off of your head or demand naked pictures of Bea Arthur. The possibilities are infinite!

I was thinking maybe trivia? Those things are terrible though, all you need a little Google and you’ve got yourself a list of perfect answers…

We’re going to make this a little harder.

In 1000 words or less, I want you tell me who would win in a fight: Joan Jett or Kristen Stewart, and why.

I’m pretty pumped about this you guys! Anyway, if you give me a good solid answer, you’ll get a chance to win some of this FREE SCHWAG!

1. A copy of Neon Angel: The Cherie Currie Story written by Cherie Currie and Neal Schusterman. This also happens to be the book that this movie is based on and we all know that the book is always better.

Cherie Currie, with her signature Bowie haircut and fishnet stockings, was the groundbreaking lead singer of ’70s teenage all-girl rock band the Runaways. At the tender age of fifteen, she joined a group of talented girls—Joan Jett and Lita Ford on guitar, Jackie Fox on bass, and Sandy West on drums—who could play rock like no one else.

Arriving on the Los Angeles music scene in 1975, they catapulted from playing small clubs to selling out major stadiums, headlining shows with opening acts like the Ramones, Van Halen, Cheap Trick, and Blondie. Currie lit up the stage with the provocative teen-rebellion songs “Cherry Bomb,” “Queens of Noise,” and “Born to Be Bad,” riding a wave of hit songs and platinum albums, all while touring around the world.

On the face of it, Currie’s is a riveting story of girl empowerment and fame. But it is also an intensely personal account of her struggles with drugs, sexual abuse, and violence. She and her bandmates, runaways all, were thrown into a decadent, high-pressure music scene where on the road, unsupervised for months at a time, they had to grow up fast and experience things that no teenage girls should. Neon Angel exposes the side of the music industry fans never get to see, and chronicles the group’s rise to fame and their ultimate demise.

Shocking and inspiring, funny and touching, Neon Angel stunningly re-creates a bygone era of rock and roll, all the while providing an inside look at growing up hard under the relentless glare of the public eye, and chronicling one tough woman’s fight to reclaim her life.

2. Joan Jett by Todd Oldham and Kathleen Hanna.

Rock-and-roll goddess Joan Jett holds a beloved place in the world of music. She started her first band, The Runaways, at age fifteen and has blazed a trail that has inspired and thrilled her fans to this day. AMMO Books is proud to release this authorized, loving tribute conceived and authored by designer Todd Oldham. The book chronicles all aspects of her career and passions through images—from forming The Runaways, to her years of touring with her band, Joan Jett and The Blackhearts. JOAN JETT features many never-before-seen photos, ephemera, and excerpts from thirty years worth of interviews, carefully curated with Joan herself, covering the multi-decade career of a real rock-and-roll icon. A thoughtful introduction written by renown indie rocker and Riot Grrrl Kathleen Hanna brings context to this exciting title.

Joan Jett is a revered songwriter, musician, and American icon. In keeping with her pioneering spirit, she went on to be the first woman to start her own independent rock label, Blackheart Records. Joan Jett and The Blackhearts Greatest Hits compilation will be released in March 2010 , and a film based on The Runaways starring Dakota Fanning, and Kristen Stewart as Joan Jett, will be released on March 19, 2010.

3. The Runaways Original Motion Picture Soundtrack.

Kristen Stewart and Dakota Fanning star as Joan Jett and Cherie Currie in The Runaways, the music-fueled, coming of age story of the groundbreaking, all girl 1970’s rock band. Written and directed by Floria Sigismondi, Apparition will release the film on March 19, 2010.

Los Angeles 1975, Joan Jett (KRISTEN STEWART) and Cherie Currie (DAKOTA FANNING), two teenage valley girls with punk in their blood, meet and become the heart and soul of the seminal all girl band, The Runaways. Floria Sigismondi brings The Runaways to the big screen in this story of a group of extraordinary young women as they rise from rebellious Southern California kids to rock stars of the now legendary band that paved the way for future generations of girl musicians. Under the Svengali-like influence of rock impresario Kim Fowley (MICHAEL SHANNON), the group evolves into an outrageous success and a family of misfits. With its tough-chick image and raw talent, the band quickly earns a name for itself-and so do its two leads: Joan is the band’s pure rock’ n’ roll heart, while Cherie, with her Bowie-Bardot looks, is the sex kitten.

Soundtrack features classic music from The Runaways, plus Runaways songs performed by Dakota Fanning & Kristen Stewart. Also, music from Joan Jett, David Bowie, The Stooges, MC5 and more.

4. Joan Jett & the Blackhearts new, remastered, greatest-hits album.

2 CD, The two disc collection features seven songs featured in the film The Runaways including one previously unreleased track. Re-recorded material featuring several Runaways favorites. Remastered original material.

*There aren’t any. Anything is fair game. Bonus points for creativity.
*The drawing for these awesome prizes will be held on May 10, 2010. Winners will be listed on that date.
*If you DO win, prizes will be shipped regular, plain ol’ snail mail. No exceptions.
*No purchase necessary, void where prohibited, blah blah blah.
*Bribes and flattery will be accepted.
*This contest is open to anyone in the United States. I’m not paying to ship this shit to Uruguay. Get over it.
*To enter: Leave your answer and email address (so I can contact you if you win) in the comments below. If you’re all paranoid about your email address, you can email me your answer at

1-2-3, GO!!!

And here are the results! Congratulations to the winners!


14 thoughts on “The Runaways: FREE GIVE AWAY! WOOO!

  1. Soooooooooooooooo……The obvious answer is Joan Jett, i vote for Twilight chica. I mean bitch has not only pussy vampire friends, but she also hangs out with a werewolf!! A fuckin werewolf!! I think that she is actually the greatest actress in the world, and thats why shes so bad, shes acting!!!!!! Shes also acting meek and in real life she is a psycho killer (Qu’est-ce que c’est?) she has learned many things from her vampire brethren and if Joan Jett tries to pull some sneak attack stuff she will throw a football and knock her head off! I saw her throw a mean spiral on Conan.

    That is all for I am hungover.

  2. Naked pictures of Bea Arthur? Are you an Airheads fan??
    Joan would win CLEARLY, but you don’t have to consider this an entry acause I’m not up for writing an essay on it. I just wanted to see if you like Airheads, or if you just often think about naked Bea.
    But, the 4 words above do fulfill the “requirements”…

  3. So I’m writing this again b/c it didn’t post on here like I thought it did when I last saw it. Here’s what I wrote or what I remember writing:

    When I think about your question, I have only one answer in mind, Joan Jett would win hands down. Kristen Stewart may be one of my favorite actresses, but I mean it’s Joan Jett we’re talking about here. She is the best female Rock and Roll artist on the planet, no one can top her. Kristen may have portrayed her in The Runaways, but no one can be better than Joan. When I imagine them both in a fighting ring, I see Kristen standing in one corner shivering nervously at the thought of having to fight against Joan, while Joan is just standing there all relaxed finishing her cigarette just waiting for the damn bell to ring. Once the bell rings, Joan puts out the cigarette in her mouth, chews it, and spits it out in Kristen’s face. She approaches Kristen head on with a Superman Punch, which knocks Kristen to the ground and allows Joan to sit on her and beat the shit out of her lip biting, eye blinking, stuttering self. While Kristen is crying for mercy waving her skinny arms around trying to get out of Joan Jett’s hold, Joan gets the energy she needs from her cries and beats her some more. Once Joan breaks the first sweat, she wipes if off with Kristen’s shirt then licks Kristen’s blood and says, “Go back to your Twilight life bitch. I am the one and only Joan Jett. Have a nice day.” Joan would win in a heartbeat.

  4. When I think about Joan Jett, I think Badassness! You just asked a question which only has one answer; Joan would win hands down. Kristen is one of my favorite actresses, but shit we’re talking about Joan Jett here! I mean she is the best and baddest female Rock and Roll artist on this planet. Kristen has no fighting chance at all, not even a 0.000001% of winning in a fight. Joan would kick her and anyone else ass for that matter. Her talented hands would snap Kristen’s neck in less than a second. I could only imagine both of them in a ring, Kristen shaking nervously biting her lip more than usual and blinking like crazy, while Joan just stands there all relaxed finishing her cigarette staring at her just waiting for the bell to ring. When the bell rings, Joan puts the cigarette out in her mouth chewing it then spitting it in Kristen’s face while she cries. Joan runs and jumps on top of Kristen with a Superman punch, knocking Kristen down, which allows Joan to sit on top of her and beat the living shit out of her blinking, lip biting, stuttering self! All the while Kristen is crying for mercy, but Joan just laughs at the sound of her voice and the look on her face. Once Joan breaks the first sweat, she wipes it off with Kristen’s shirt and licks her blood saying, “You may have pretended to be me in The Runaways, but I am the one and only Joan Jett, go back to your Twilight life bitch! Have a shitty ass day!

  5. My moms name is Joan.
    I am Irish like some whiskey.
    My confirmation middle name was Joan.
    The second half to my first name is Jo..half of Joan.
    My last name has an “an”…:Jo+An=Joan.
    My cats name is “Jett”a.
    I will be rallying for Lolita May 15th.
    Amanda is so pretty.
    I like to read non fiction.
    Foxes is one of my favorite movies.
    “I would like to eat a fruit from the tree she was buried under.”
    Did I mention I am awesome?

  6. Joan Jett would hands down win. This can’t be a serious question. This is Joan Jett we’re talking about here! She basically started the Runaways, proved herself that she can not only play electric guitar but play it GREAT, and she’s just badass. Don’t get me wrong, I love K-Stew and she’s not a bad actress at all, but did I mention how beastly Joan Jett ia? Kristen Stewart portrayed her quite well in the film (I saw it twice… I am obsessed with Joan), and I love her and all, but Joan Jett is legendary. In all reality, Kristen would not have played Joan in this movie if Joan hadn’t followed her dreams and done everything she had; there would BE no movie. This may be my opinion, but a lot of what I’ve stated is also fact. Kristen is thid generation’s celebrity, but Joan Jett could never be forgotten. Not a chance. Joan Jett all the way.
    Love Joan, her personality, her music, her attitude and her determination. There’s nothing to dislike. I would die and come back to life if I won this prize. Some people just don’t understand obsession, but my love for Joan is neverending. So um yeah. Please pick me. Joan Jett for President.

  7. In the sleepy backwater Pittsburgh suburb of Carnegie, a young writer awoke one morning to find a bizarre, yet not unwelcome, surprise on her doorstep. The taxidermied rat-monkey-platypus….. thing held only a single tag attached to it. And written on that tag was a brief message saying this:

    “Thank you for making this possible – Joan”

    This is the story of how and why that….. thing came to pass.

    Kristen Stewart strode onto the field of battle, and she did not stride alone, for she strode with an army of emos, Twilight-moms, and Hot Topic afficiandos. They had stridden and strode to and fro ’til they could strid-stride no more. Then they decided to call a cab because the foolish bastards forgot they lived in the 21st century. When the cab dropped them off, the paid their fare, then strode (again) the 50 feet to where they were now. Atop a hill facing their singular opponent, Joan Jett.

    Joan stood alone, and aside from a pack of Marlboro Reds, a flask of Jameson, and a squirming burlap sack, she was unarmed. But far from outmatched. Joan lit herself cigarette, kicked back a stiff swig of the 12 year old Irish Whiskey, shook it of, and smiled. Like the Bride standing before the Crazy-88, a defiant Joan flipped off the Twilight-obsessed minions of Kristen Stewart; daring them to charge.

    And charge they did. The ground shook violently, rocks began to crumble, trees came loose from dirt, Spencer Pratt still had no idea he was a useless douche that everyone despised, and Joan stood her ground, unafraid. As the army drew closer, Joan opened the sack before her, producing a beaten and bloodied Stefanie Meyers. One handed, Joan held her aloft by the neck before her pasty faced, asexual opponents. And promptly snapped her neck like a dried out twig. The Forces of Kristen (or FOKers, for short), stopped dead in their tracks at the sight of their God being killed. For a moment, there was silence; oh-so-delicious silence. Then, before the battle Armageddon began, a few thing happened.

    The most important of those thing that happened was an ease upon the world; a rapturous feeling emerging from the masses. And everyone knew what they had to do make the world right again. Robert Patterson, Pattinson, uhmmmm, the gay vampire from Twilight smiled and knew he was free to have a tan and be in good movies again. A bear shit in the woods. Punk rockers (Homo anarchiosisii) and Vampire Purists (Homo Nocturnum Stokerus/Whedonus) aliked joined forces to raze the corrupted Temples Of Hot Topic and Barnes and Noble. Any who were near descended upon the battlefield like the Biblical Plague of Locusts descended upon Egypt, and a battle that had only been previously imagned by J.R.R. Tolkien occured.

    But Kristen had not noticed anything after the snapping of Meyers’ neck. She fell upon the ground frozen and rigid, much like her ‘acting.’ The clanging of battle did not reach her ears, only the THUD of Joan’s gait and the squeaking of her leather pants registered in Kristen’s vacuous skull. Gazing dead eyed at her vanquisher, Kristen had a sudden, unwelcome pain in her head. It was her brain giving birth to her very first thought, and that thought was I’M FUCKED. A quick death was all that she could hope for. When Joan reached Kristen, she bent down on one knee, and whispered.

    “We survived disco, we survived New Wave and Hair Metal. We survived rap-metal and boy bands. Did you honestly think you could win here today? Hpmph. That’s just plain old dumb. But on the bright side, you get to live. You get to live to see your followers die and hate you for failing them. You get to live to see your empire crumble before your feet. You get to live as Prometheus did after giving fire to humans. You get to live so you can suffer and die every day; only to awake the next day, and the next. Over. And Over. Again. And I hope you ‘live’ forever.”

    Joan stood up, turned, any walked away; disappearing into the dust of the battle. It was over. And the world became right again. Hot Topics were no longer trendy and restored to their previous glory as an underground chain where the motto “ONLY THE MUSIC MATTERED” regained it’s integrity. Vampires were free to explode and combust in the sunlight once again, though they choose not to because, y’know, it would fucking kill them. Romance novel were again romantic; no longer twisted road maps to torturously bad relationships. Spencer Pratt still had no clue he was douche that everyone hated, tho. But hey, three outta four is still pretty damn good.

    And in the sleepy backwater Pittsburgh suburb of Carnegie, a young writer awoke one morning to find a bizarre, yet not unwelcome, surprise on her doorstep. The taxidermied rat-monkey-platypus….. thing held only a single tag attached to it. And written on that tag was a brief message saying this:

    “Thank you for making this possible – Joan”

    That’s what we call going full circle, bitches.

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